Love

I screamed.
And you sat there with vacant eyes. 
I told you that I loved you and you shrugged.
I wondered what that meant but I didn’t ask.
I knew that you were all knotted up inside yourself. 
I didn’t dare offer to untie you. 
I just waited.
For the day you admitted you couldn’t handle me anymore.
Because I was too much.
My tears kept you up one night too many. 
Your snoring kept me up one night too few,
Even though it was every night.
I tried. 
I’ll be able to say that forever. 
Tried to convince you to feel calmed each time you looked into my green eyes.
To laugh at my poorly timed jokes.
To keep you smiling.
To keep you happy.
To keep myself sane.
And then you left me. 
Anyway.
Because that was never enough.
I wasn’t not enough.
I was too much.
And I was too sorry.
And too in love. 
I’m always too in love…
Too captivated by those eyes and lips.
And trying not to let go.
Even though I know
It’s all gone.
And I’m the one
Who made it so.
How strange love is. 
Falling asleep in one another’s familiar arms.
Waking up strangers.

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