People Just are not Good to Each Other

 

This IS what you wanted.
To hurt me.
Though I don’t understand why.
I have never tried to hurt you.
Still, you take it upon yourself,
To cut me down,
To call me names.

I know that I am better than this,
Than sticking around,
But I am here,
Hung up in the moment,
Disarmed by your cruelty.
I just can’t walk away.

Please, list all the reasons I make your stomach churn.
My dotted skin,
Crooked teeth,
Too tall,
Too proud,
Too insecure,
To immature,
Tell me why I will never be good
Enough.

The effects will last forever.
And when my skin clears,
And I fill into myself,
I’ll perpetually be hated,
For not being gracious,
For a pretty face.

My reflection will always remind me,
How ugly I am,
In your eyes.
I will never forget the reasons,
Why,
What you outlined.

You dug into me,
Like dirt beneath nails,
Nesting in dry,
Cracked,
Hands.

I thought you liked the way you felt,
Around me.
But as you grew bored,
I grew horns.

And I learned so young,
Things do not get better with time.
They just get faster.

What you do not yet know,
Is someday,
You will hear my name,
In passing,
And find out where I have been.

Sadly, to places you will never go,
With people whose beauty you could never know,
Because I will make noise,
And I will create change.

While you seem set to forever be the same.

Perhaps I will owe my success,
In part,
To you.

For you may motivate me to shed my own negativity,
Out of empathy.
Because I know,
Someone is not as cruel as you,
On isolated occasions.

I hope you do not hurt someone,
Who may not have the strength to move on.

And I hope it is not always easier for you to hate than love.

I feel sorry for you.
Behind the anger,
I know you feel lost and out of place,
In a world,
Where the minimum
Is the best
You can do.

So when I am ready to be warmed up,
I will walk away.
Leaving you behind,
To thaw on your own.

You’re cold. So cold.

Title reference:Bukowski:The Crunch

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