Well you mumbled that you loved me with all the conviction of a nervous child telling his grandmother that her pea soup was delicious.
But we both know the kid will reach for a glass of water soon as she turns her back to chase the sticky concoction down.
I watched your empty eyes dart all over as you struggled to wait for the after taste of your words to disappear.
I saw your pain. I took pity and I walked away.
Forgive me for trying to help. I didn’t even know how to stand on my own.
But you didn’t have to look me in the eyes, tell me those lies, pull me close, then throw me away.
All we had to do was forget.
Love is only memories. Mine happened to be more vivid. My smile and eyes were dull painted pictures in your mind compared to others.
I’m trying not to hate myself for caring so deeply about someone else who doesn’t even crave my touch.
So I wrote down all my thoughts before I said my final goodbye. And I thought about letting you see. But I tossed them out with the pizza box because I didn’t think you’d understand.